Half the Equation
I’ve been very frustrated with myself, realizing that an hour-long weight training workout isn’t going to change my body much if it is followed by quenching my thirst with a soda and satisfying cravings with pure junk. It is embarrassing how terriby I fuel my body for my workouts!
Half the equation gives me essentially nothing. Why waste my time and energy this way? So many things we do while trying to lose weight and get in shape are certifiably insane, aren’t they? If someone else told me “I worked out for an hour but had McDonald’s for dinner”, I’d slap sense into them.
It’s a waste of time and disrespectful of the energy and sweat I put into my workouts to not eat right or drink enough water, so I consider myself officially slapped :)
Much of my writing here is making promises to myself, and I haven’t kept very many of them. If I keep going this way, I will be heading home in December still overweight, still unhappy, and I will have a miserable visit with my family. I don’t want to do that to myself.
In any other aspect of my life, I’d never tolerate the level of failure that I have tolerated in relation to my weight. Why? Something to think about. But in the meantime, I will plan out my meals for tomorrow, make sure my water bottles are full, and take time each morning to remind myself that half the equation is not going to get me where I want to be. Not even close.
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Maybe your not taking in enough calories before working out so at the end of your work out you are starving and grab whatever is there? Stay strong hun, You have beaten all this weight and Bull shit before and I know for a fact you can and will do it again, One minute,hour or day at a time! We are all here for you!!!
I am sorry to hear u struggling like this, MJ! U ARE superwoman! Keep blogging it out and promising urself and Ur follow thru will come ! I have the utmost FAITH in you!
keep writing it all down. you will get it all straight soon. your struggle is part of the journey and learning experience.. now well you said you would slap someone.. can I cyber slap you into shape?
keep going keep truckin you will get tehre
You’ll get back to it. In the mean time don’t beat yourself up too bad, that never helps. Just remember 1 step at a time.
OOOOOh… When you love exercise, it’s so easy to work out, but when you love food, it’s so hard to “eat right”. Ugh! I always read Kerstin saying in her blogs 80% good and 20% junk… I wonder if that would help you at all? I guess I sort of do that too without really meaning to… If I eat everything else healthy but have a serving of Cheetos or something with lunch, I still call it a good day.
Moderation! 
One thing that always makes me binge or just generally eat crappy, is mentally trying too hard to be “perfect”. There’s no such thing! Try for “good” or even “excellent” it gives ya more wiggle room.
Sometimes that’s all you need, because at least for me, thinking I need to be perfect sets me up, cuz then I’ll have a tiny bit of junk food (don’t we always?) and then start thinking I can’t do it… It’s too hard… It doesn’t matter… Binge.
What I do is PLAN healthy meals, PLAN to eat well, and if I want some chips or a piece of chocolate, I go for it when the urge strikes, but keep it to one serving. It’s working so far.
Anyway, I know you’ll find what works for you, because you’re smart and determined. I know you can do this MJ! 